16 years ago a woman I
was dating begged me to take a young puppy from the shelter where she worked.
She told the story of how he was to be euthanized because no one would take
him.
They couldn't find a
home for him because he ran from everyone, would not let anyone close, he was
terrified of people.
The rest of story was
that someone had hurt him badly.
Who could ever abuse such a beautiful, loyal, devoted friend like Jack? |
I thought I was doing
him favor, I believed I was being of service. I bestowed the honor of naming
him Jack, after a great man in my life who had passed on a few years earlier.
Jack was allowed to be
who he was, desperately wanting love and attention, crippled by fear. It took 2
solid years before he trusted me enough to allow his belly to be rubbed.
Through out his life he
never lost his fear, he did grow to trust that he was safe with me, that i was
not going to hurt him.
Every single interaction
we had through his life, I would patiently let him go through his ritual of
shaking with fear, and barking until he felt comfortable enough for me to touch
him.
I thought it was I who
was being of service to him
Today I am 10 years
sober.
The math points out Jack
was with me 6 years before my current sobriety date. The darkest period of my
life. Jack loved me unconditionally when I wasn't very lovable.
My faithful companion
through out.
I now have a better idea
of who was being of service to whom.
Today perhaps I was of
service.
Jack was tired, life had
become hard, and painful for the old man.
When the vet
administered the sedative, Jack relaxed. Maybe truly relaxed, without fear for
the only time in his long life.
Rest in Peace my sweet
companion.
There is a very special
place waiting for you
Colin James
Plano, TX